Using Email, Going Online Independently
Over the next few years, start increasing the difficulty of the software available and pay close attention to which things keep your kids engaged. This allows you to seek out new programs that match their interests, but may also give you some idea of other preferences in their life. Expect that there will be peer pressure to try out games that are more violent or suggestive than you prefer. Don’t be afraid to say no, but also take the time to see if there are more appropriate alternatives for your kids.
As your child approaches the teenage years, there are a lot of parenting decisions to be made. When are they old enough to go out with friends on their own? When can they date? These decisions are closely related to what should be appropriate for their computer usage at home.
When you allow your kids out on their own, you’re putting a certain amount of trust in them, as well as some faith in your skills as a parent. Allowing a child to use email or the web alone requires that same trust and faith. Only you know your child well enough to make the decision about allowing that level of independence, but this is a good time to start testing things out. It should be noted that the age of 13 is the cut-off for the Children’s Privacy Protection Act, suggesting that after that age, kids are getting old enough to understand what information they should, and should not share with others. This might help you make the decision for your own family
Regardless of when you decide it’s appropriate to let go of some of the control over what your kids see and do, it’s not a good idea to simply walk away. Let your kids know that you’ll be monitoring their activities to make sure that they are following the rules and behaving in safe manner. Explain that they need to prove that they are able to take the responsibility seriously and that it will take some time. Spot checking email correspondence and the browser history can help you make sure they’re sticking to their guidelines.
Letting Go
At some point you’re going to have to let go of your kids and hope that you’ve taught them well. After all, they won’t live at home forever. As your child progresses through their teenage years, it’s a good time to start to give them more privacy and trust. Continue to keep an eye on their habits, taking note if they seem to be spending too much time online, or neglecting their friends.
